You are considering a night out on the town, but you don’t know where to go. Let the computer make all the right choices for you. Head straight to the bar/event/location with the highest concentration of attractive females. Do pay in a buck or two. The information has been collected by cunning males close to your area. You are alerted of high concentration of females right on your Android phone. Every time a male enters an establishment and notices a high concentration of attractive females, he issues an alert, which he gets paid for (from the sum of all males who wish to obtain information about the particular bar/establishment/location at that time).
In other words, Google Map the whole thing, and let people pay up for prime locations, in real time.
Most of the single population of the U.S. hasn’t figured it out yet, but the facts are here. Chances are, if you are looking for love and having trouble, all you need to do is move. New York City is overloaded with beautiful girls who are very open and, in fact, eager to meet new men, while San Francisco is chock full of frustrated high-earning men who are fighting it out for the few females that are here. Here are a few links that visualize this situation (all based on Census data):
All this can be explained by natural patterns of human migration. U.S.A. is a relatively new nation, which has traditionally been populated from east to west. Men are explorers, and they always seek to move on to new lands, and so they have migrated to California and the western states, while females, for the most part, have remained in the well-established east coast.
If You Are A Girl, Move to San Francisco
Men here are frustrated and have very low standards. Some of them make a lot of money (thanks to the proximity of Silicon Valley). It’s true that there are a lot of creeps and losers here, but there are also a lot of winners (SF is full of men and men tend to fall into extremes when it comes to winning or failing). Any halfway decent looking girl who comes to SF will be able to easily identify who is who and pretty soon have her pick of eager Prince Charmings who will bestow on her all the material and emotional bliss she can desire, if properly encouraged. Here is a blog that explains this situation in amazing detail:
Once you step your feet onto Houston street on any given evening, the situation becomes obvious. Here, there are nothing but models strolling through. There is no competition whatsoever. It’s literally nothing but models. If you see groups of people, it’s usually two or three girls and one guy. If you walk into a fancy wine bar, it’s even more extreme: at each table, 4 or 5 girls to one guy. All you have to do is be there, dress well, sit and look pretty while holding up a glass of champagne. They will initiate the conversation. Take it from there. Enough said.
Conclusion
I highly recommend that all singles in the U.S.A. abandon their search in their local area and just move. Statistically, it is much more likely that the person who is right for you is not in your geographical area, but somewhere else. For guys, it’s east coast. For girls, it’s west coast.
Money. You must be rich, or visibly on track to become so (preferably put in the work and earn the money yourself, but you can also fake this part if you have to and/or are lazy; either way, you must publicly spend impressive amounts of money on trivial things)
Looks. You must be very good looking (if you are not and/or old, the money is your only other solution, but you will need more of it; use expensive clothes to compensate for your poor looks).
Perfection. You must be perfect, inside and out, in all ways (that means always wearing nice clothes, being in shape, eating healthy, smelling good, etc)
The slow and steady way: nonchalantly befriend a group of females, preferably a large one. Do not make your move until you have become good friends with all of them (otherwise they will call your a creep, or some other similar name; you must guard your reputation at all times)
The fast and sneaky way: approach a girl quickly, reveal your intentions early on, but suggest the aura of a “secret romance.” Make it clear that you two must hide the relationship from all other people in your social group. The notion of secrecy relaxes the girl because she does not have to worry about what her friends think of you. In this case, she will be more willing to develop a relationship with you even if she considers you “substandard” or “not quite alpha male material.” Because no one else knows, her reputation will not be affected.
Always repair/mend. If you are rejected, you must repair the damage and use your targets as bait for other targets, always expanding your network.
Do not trust! When you are friends with a girl, do not trust her like you trust your male buddies; women are, by nature, treacherous and clever creatures and will try to deceive you (to extract money from you, to acquire living rights/position in real estate, to ultimately get their way and leave you high and dry)
Don’t listen! Instead, Look and Analyze. You must not listen to what girls say, but judge them by their actions. Girls like to use vague emotional appeals designed to either destroy someone’s reputation or make temporary alliances to outmaneuver you and/or acquire resources and/or move on to a more powerful male. Remember: they are subconsciously interested in only two things: acquiring resources, and the best male genes. What this means is that if an army were to come and slay you and all your friends they would most likely happily join the victorious side, eventually forgetting you and instead making love to the enemy that slain you. They would marry your murderers, live on your land, and use your resources to propagate their genes without any reservation, because evolution is a cold and heartless process. It’s a rather harsh truth, but this is how the game works; the victor gets the girls. Get used to it.
Be in the top 5%. Males are generally useless and easily replaceable, unless they are in the top 5% or so (it takes fewer males to keep a population going, and for that simple reason they are not as valuable as females in the grand scheme of things). Ideally, you need to be in that top 5%, as far as most characteristics go (money, looks, charm, wisdom, strength, connections, whatever, etc). This will generally guarantee that you will win most battles and after all will be able to keep your girlfriends, resources and reputation intact.
Time is on your side. You must always remember that while it seems like women are more powerful than you are, you get a lot more time in this life to get your game right. Girls burn out quickly and become much less valuable/attractive by the time they are 30. You, on the other hand, can keep your game going until you are well into your 50′s, or even later! As you get older, you will acquire more resources, gain wisdom and experience that, ultimately, will make this game easier for you, so relax and rejoice because you know that time is, ultimately, on your side.
Why have we evolved something as useless as a propensity to carry on an unanswered romantic obsession? How exactly was prolonged unrequited love useful in our hunter-gatherer days? If romantic obsession is reciprocated there is a clear evolutionary advantage to both parties. Partners will stay together long enough to create some children and likely raise them to a level of relative self-sustenance. However, if romantic obsession is unanswered, it clearly does not pay in the evolutionary terms. But romantic obsession does not simply go away as would make sense for our survival and reproductive success, it only gets amplified. Much energy is subsequently wasted on fruitless pursuits by the affected person.
There is clearly no advantage for anyone to exhibit this phenomenon in today’s world. At least, the world I live in. Unrequited love results in all sorts of bad things, ranging from months and years of depression all the way up to restraining orders, suicide and violent crime. So what kind of nature’s trick is this?
What exactly was so different back then that created this mechanism of obsession and actually encouraged it to flourish, even if it was unanswered. I think that this is because relationships today are different from the ones we had in our hunter-gatherer days in one very important way. Most of the personal relationships in today’s civilized world have little to do with out physical survival. Sure, we have friends and lovers and our relationships with them, for the most part, do no affect how we obtain food, shelter and protection from enemies. Instead, we get our food and shelter from an institution that we collectively call “work.” We get our protection from enemies from our government, our laws and our law enforcement agencies, not from our friends. I imagine that things were very different in the past.
Imagine a world in which you have to dig around for food in a forest or out in the savanna and your partners in this business are all your friends and potential lovers. Imagine that while foraging, you have encountered a scary neighboring tribe that speaks a different language, has a different culture and wants to throw rocks at you. Imagine that somehow through a virtue of one of your friends or potential lovers, you were rescued from this situation. Imagine that you were hungry and weak for days, and then suddenly one of your potential lovers encountered food and shared it with you. Those are all very simple and generic examples, but they illustrate my point. In the past, people’s relationships have had more opportunities to develop in surprising ways because survival was mixed into them.
I am going to guess that people had more reasons to bond together than they do today, for reasons of survival. Obsessive romantic behavior probably had a very different meaning in the world of our past. When you are obsessed with someone romantically, you naturally wish to strengthen your relationship with them. You wish to help them, to make them happy, to somehow bond with them. In the world of our past, there would have been plenty of opportunities to do this. You could give them food or you could tell them a location of a source of food. You could entertain them with a story. You could protect them from an attack of a neighboring tribe. You could spot and kill a poisonous bug that was crawling up to them. You could cure them from disease. All that would have mattered is that they thought you did. But what opportunities do you have for such benevolent actions toward the object of your affection today?
Well, you have very few. Usually they already have everything they need for survival and much more. They have a job and supermarkets for an uninterrupted supply of food. You can still try to entertain them with a story, but there are fewer opportunities to do so since they now have gazillions of books, moves and TV shows to choose from that stimulate their imagination and take care of all their entertainment needs.
You can no longer protect them from an attack of a neighboring tribe, that’s what police are for. And besides, there are no neighboring tribes to speak of. You can’t protect them from a poisonous bug because there aren’t any in our homes, for the most part. You cannot cure them from disease (that’s what doctors are for). Again, those are all very rough and cliche examples, but I hope that you get my point: unrequited love today is useless because you cannot give the object of your affection anything that they truly need, be it in a physical or an emotional sense, in order to strengthen your relationship with them and make them like you. But this was not always so.
I believe that there was a time in our history when unrequited love might have actually been considered something other than an annoyance and a disease of the mind that it is today. There was a time when a propensity to develop unrequited love was an evolutionary advantage, due to the circumstances of human life, but that is clearly no longer so. Does this mean that people who fall in love deeply will be outbred? Does this mean that romantic love as we know it will eventually die, disappear from human consciousness, and human experience? Sadly, it may be so.
